Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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