oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
please don't ironically join a cult
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