do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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