Kiss
Puke
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
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He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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