that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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