I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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