god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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