I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
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He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
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My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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