You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
