I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
