you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
