It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize