You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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