Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize