if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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