so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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