Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I got inside last night via doggy door
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize