If i come over, it means nothing
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
