So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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