Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
