its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
