But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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