Texts From Last Night

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  (208): View more from Idaho

  THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT

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  (208): THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT http://tfl.nu/btha
  Replies (22) Good night (2886) Bad night (1089)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.

  (1-912): View more from Georgia

  Who leaves their car unlocked at night?

  (912): View more from Georgia

  Someone who wants to read the newspaper.

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  (912): So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper. (1-912): Who leaves their car unlocked at night? (912): Someone who wants to read the newspaper. http://tfl.nu/c19o
  Replies (23) Good night (7002) Bad night (635)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day

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  (912): i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day http://tfl.nu/5rbo
  Replies (29) Good night (5796) Bad night (1079)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.

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  (860): Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth. http://tfl.nu/vl66
  Replies (16) Good night (1377) Bad night (5821)
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  (+54): View more from

  My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed

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  (+54): My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed http://tfl.nu/m32v
  Replies (30) Good night (8252) Bad night (1074)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost

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  (215): Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost http://tfl.nu/oth1
  Replies (4) Good night (3951) Bad night (895)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night

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  (561): A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night http://tfl.nu/8aub
  Replies (6) Good night (2836) Bad night (639)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.

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  (989): He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT. http://tfl.nu/p01t
  Replies (8) Good night (635) Bad night (1963)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I didn't know

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  (703): You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday... (410): I didn't know http://tfl.nu/kzg0
  Replies (1) Good night (1463) Bad night (426)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud

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  (915): I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud http://tfl.nu/k3wa
  Replies (5) Good night (1052) Bad night (394)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.

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  (817): You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres. http://tfl.nu/or4y
  Replies (3) Good night (1685) Bad night (299)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..

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  (570): Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours.. http://tfl.nu/vg6d
  Replies (1) Good night (599) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover

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  (815): Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover http://tfl.nu/dbpl
  Replies (4) Good night (830) Bad night (608)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...

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  (443): Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume... http://tfl.nu/owv3
  Replies (7) Good night (476) Bad night (192)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.

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  (989): Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it. http://tfl.nu/6s40
  Replies (1) Good night (704) Bad night (165)

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