He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Randomize
