what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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