I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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