I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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