You made me cry and you don't even care
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?