i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
