Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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