there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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