I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
