I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
