But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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