Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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