There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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