how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
