I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
