I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
