So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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