Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
so that wasnt chicken after all
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
