East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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