i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
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