I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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