Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
