Christians are straight up FREAKS
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
