it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
