my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
