# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
