WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize