Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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